Relationship Tips for a Happy Love Life

Relationships make or break a person. Let’s face it; we all need affection, intimacy, understanding, and belongingness from another special human being. We crave something very different than the love from our family and friends. However, as we start to form relationships and grow as a person, we make mistakes. We may regret being with the wrong person or regret the things we did or that we could have done better to make things work with that very special person. But in spite of the mistakes you may have made along the way, there are some very positive things that you can do now, to make your relationship better today! 

Quick Tips from the Gottman Research

For years, The Gottman Method has been helping couples improve the quality of their relationships by teaching innovative scientifically-based techniques that improve the quality of the communication and which ultimately lower the level of relationship conflict. Here are some of the Gottman techniques that are used by Sherwood Couples Counseling. You can apply them now!

1. Think before you speak. Most of the time, arguments and fights spiral out of control, not because of the issue itself, but because of the emotional attitude and tone of voice. Instead of confronting your partner in an angry manner, soften your approach. Raising your complaints and concerns gently and respectfully will help both of you listen and stay open to the problem so that you can solve it faster and more effectively.

2. Appreciate the contributions of your partner. Focus on the bright side by recognizing and expressing appreciation for the positive things your partner does. Cultivating the habit of appreciation lets your partner know that you are mindful of their contributions and helps maintain a healthy loving connection between both of you.

3. Learn to listen. Listening is a skill and learning to listen patiently and willingly will help you learn to accept the influence of your partner, especially in the areas that are really important to your partner. Consider that your listening is a gift that lets your partner know you care and that you understand. Being open to the ideas and opinions of your partner not only helps you understand your partner’s wants and needs; it also helps you recognize and appreciate the rich differences that make your relationship special and unique. Listen fully and completely before you object and say no and let your partner speak without interruption. It might sometimes be exciting to follow your partner’s lead, even if you don’t completely agree.

Remember, there are no perfect relationships and that problems and their solutions vary from couple to couple. Try using these 3 quick tips to boost the energy in your relationship. If you need more help, call us at Sherwood Couples Counseling. We are committed to improving the quality of lives by improving the quality of relationships.

Sherwood Couples Counseling: building skills, providing hope!